MANILA, Philippines — Cebu Pacific president and chief executive officer Glance Lokongwei on Monday night announced their company’s plan to bring back their famous promo, and personally apologizing for the mishandling of a six-year-old passenger, after one of its flight attendant accidentally poured hot water on her arm.
“I’m sorry it took so long for us to issue a public apology, but such is the case that you should expect from a budget airline with cheap-ass rates,” said Lokongwei.
He also reiterated that cheapskate passengers who prefer affordable rates should not expect much during their trip with Cebu Pacific.
“It’s piso for crying out loud,” he added. “Imagine the costs that would entail to fully train a cabin crew with basic first aid skills, let alone basic instant-noodle-making skills!”
As for gaining back the public’s trust as well as a response to to the girl’s father, who’s considering filing charges against the attendant and the company; Lokongwei made an announcement of bringing back their Centavo Fare promo.
“We are proud to announce our Centavo Fare promo that includes our patented crappy customer service, our same emergency response behavior, and the same overpriced on-board instant noodles for 99 centavo less.”
The Centavo Fare promo is open to all Domestic and International destinations for the second half of 2014.
“If you are planning to have a vacation this time of the year, or if you just want to experience being poured hot, scalding water while flying 30,000 feet in the air; then this is the best time to book your tickets for a very very low price.”
But Lokongwei was quick to reiterate the last part of his statement and reminded everyone that they have learned their lesson.
“Instead of pouring hot water to cook our overpriced noodles, our crew is now trained to just pour cold water over them,” he said.
Customers who will complain of cold, uncooked noodles would be reminded that such is the price they have to (or have not) pay for buying such promo.
Lokongwei expects passengers to beg them not to pour hot water on their instant noodles for as long as they would be spared from first degree burns.
“If this doesn’t help bring back our loyal customers, we are seriously looking at offering free tickets to the One Direction concert, just to appease every Juan,” revealed Lokongwei
“That or producing an alternate ending to Game of Throne’s S04E08 ‘The Mountain and the Viper’ episode.”