The vaccine, developed by researchers at the Center for Brain Control of the Philippines (CBCP) and the Philippine Research Office for Latent Idiocy of Flocks Everywhere (PROLIFE), consists of manipulated cells designed to produce intraleukinoplast-16 (or ILP-16) and ILP-16R alpha.
ILP-16 is a protein, naturally occurring in humans, that encourages a logic-based thinking response from the human nervous system. ILP-16R alpha is the protein’s receptor.
Researchers found that when the vaccine was given to mice, brain cell growth increased and susceptibility rates decreased — the protein and receptor effectively making their way to the temporal lobe targeting “fallacious thoughts” and signaling the nervous system to “sic ’em.”
Researchers at the CBCP and PROLIFE also assured the public that the vaccine’s production is free from any aborted fetuses or human tissues.
“No humans were harmed in the making of this ground-breaking medicinal discovery,” said CBCP’s Head of Research Development Dr. Eleanoir Pabalbal.
But she was quick to point out that, “Aside from ILP-16, the vaccine also contains stable dispersion or emulsion of polymer microparticles in an aqueous medium similar to latex,” added Pabalbal. “Latex, is used to make condoms, so I can see how a certain religious group would raise hell against this vaccine.”
The vaccine has been approved for clinical trials in humans battling stupidous-ignoramus, a type of brain malfunction; as well as in humans who practices and preaches ignorant obedience over informed choices.