CBCP Develops New Vaccine to Prevent Spread of Stupidity

test in a mobile laboratorySORSOGON, Philippines — Researchers have developed a vaccine that boosts the response of a brain’s  intellectual system towards discerning fact from fallacy.

The vaccine, developed by researchers at the Center for Brain Control of the Philippines (CBCP) and the Philippine Research Office for Latent Idiocy of Flocks Everywhere (PROLIFE), consists of manipulated cells designed to produce intraleukinoplast-16 (or ILP-16) and ILP-16R alpha.

ILP-16 is a protein, naturally occurring in humans, that encourages a logic-based thinking response from the human nervous system. ILP-16R alpha is the protein’s receptor.

Researchers found that when the vaccine was given to mice, brain cell growth increased and susceptibility rates decreased — the protein and receptor effectively making their way to the temporal lobe targeting “fallacious thoughts” and signaling the nervous system to “sic ’em.”

Researchers at the CBCP and PROLIFE also assured the public that the vaccine’s production is free from any aborted fetuses or human tissues.

“No humans were harmed in the making of this ground-breaking medicinal discovery,” said CBCP’s Head of Research Development Dr. Eleanoir Pabalbal.

But she was quick to point out that, “Aside from ILP-16, the vaccine also contains  stable dispersion or emulsion of polymer microparticles in an aqueous medium similar to latex,” added Pabalbal. “Latex, is used to make condoms, so I can see how a certain religious group would raise hell against this vaccine.”

The vaccine has been approved for clinical trials in humans battling stupidous-ignoramus, a type of brain malfunction; as well as in humans who practices and preaches ignorant obedience over informed choices.


6 thoughts on “CBCP Develops New Vaccine to Prevent Spread of Stupidity

  1. How I wish this is true, then I will overdoze inject it our elected officials, especially the president to learn how to properly discern.

  2. Saan galing yung funds ng CBCP? Nyahahaha. Another makulit at kwelang satire as always you dudes and dude-ettes from SWN, keep it up!

  3. How I wish this is true, so that pro RH peeps who spread stupidity (like the Angsioco, E. article in PDI’s “Numbers Don’t Lie”) just to promote their stupid ideology and culture of death by social engineering could be given mega doses of it to cure their stupidity.

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