PNoy to Preempt Primetime on a Daily Basis Until Approval Rating Improves

MANILA, Philippines — Malacañang announced today that the President plans to address the country on national TV everyday, preempting primetime shows in the process, until his approval rating improves.

According to presidential spokesman Edwin Lacierda, the plan is to keep repeating the same message until Filipinos get it.

“The President shall remind his ‘bosses’ on a daily basis, that he is not a thief and that the Disbursement Acceleration Program (DAP) is not pork”, said Lacierda.

The president prefers to deliver his speech right before primetime because it is the time when viewers’ attention is at its highest, according to the press statement.

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The president was quoted as saying that, “Before watching ABS-CBN’s Honesto, let me remind them na ‘mas honest ‘to'”, while pointing at himself.

No word yet whether the president would address the public clamor to scrap the Presidential Development Assistance Fund (PDAF), more popularly known as “pork barrel” or instead continue tooting his own horns and annoy TV viewers,forcing them to give him a higher approval rating so that their viewing habits are no longer disturbed.

2 thoughts on “PNoy to Preempt Primetime on a Daily Basis Until Approval Rating Improves

  1. Nice one, SWN.

    Let me add a bit:

    In related news, Kap’s Amazing Stories and Bong Revilla movies will now be seen daily before the PNoy speeches. Jinggoy’s Panday movie will be shown midnight when nobody is watching.

  2. “I am not a thief. . .I am only its creator”. . Bong & Jinggoy each one also said. . ” I am not a thief. . I am only a victim of its creator”. . continued. . ” Nanjan na ung pera . . bigay e. . pinahatid kay Napoles. .alangan di ko pa kunin. . sira ulo na kami pag ganun. . di naman kami santo e. . “

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